remember the 6-day gauntlet? today we have the secret level!
today has been very challenging for me so far. a revelation last night had left me feeling broken, adding on to the stress i’ve expected to face today. while i’ve deferred that by planning to return to the office in the evening, life still has a way to make my morning miserable.
today is the first day of another SAP course at kompleks antarabangsa. and to improve my kl navigation skills, i decided to drive there again. just as i reach the parliament, i suddenly realise that the engine temperature has hit the maximum mark. i immediately started looking for a place to stop, and ended up in front of tugu negara.
while i’m used to the car overheating before, this time it was quite sudden. and i didn’t expect it to happen after the recent engine transplant. so just to make sure i don’t mess up anything, i call my dad. he tells me to fill up the radiator again slowly as to not crack or warp the engine (something i didn’t know before :O). before that i’m supposed to get the cap open, but i did so too fast and boiling water rushed out. the water missed me, but displaced my radiator cap so fast it took me an hour to find it wedged underneath the aircon fan. and all this under the glaring morning sun.
anyways, even after filling up the radiator, the temperature continued to rise back to the maximum, and water kept flowing out the reservoir. i knew something was amiss already, so i left the car there for my dad to look at later. luckily he was in town for the day, otherwise i wouldn’t know what to do.
so i took a cab to raja chulan and here i am at training. and after this i can take the train back to the office, but from the office i’ll have no mode of transportation. not only that, i won’t know how long i’ll take to fix the problem, so i might be very very late, without anyone to help me get home. can probably just sleep at the office, maybe. hopefully nothing’ll bother me.
days like these that make me feel like my life is going nowhere.. just trying to keep up with the moment. that i’m just wasting my conscious moments on stupid things that don’t benefit me or the people around me. causing things to get out of control, run amok and explode in my face. and maybe that’s right. maybe i’ve been shortchanging myself so much that somehow my life seems worthless, even to myself. so many opportunities lost, so many branches of life that i could’ve taken to lead myself higher. so i tell myself again that i need to change, to actively look out for myself. but will i be able to..?
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